Sick
by Kage kioku aji tenshi
Summary: Thorin had asked why Bilbo had returned to them, Bilbo didn't have the strength to tell him the truth that even Gandalf didn't know so he had said something about homes and them not having one.


Summary: Thorin had asked why Bilbo had returned to them, Bilbo didn't have the strength to tell him the truth that even Gandalf didn't know so he had said something about homes and them not having one.

Bilbo sat quietly watching the dwarves mill about as Oin tended to Thorin's injuries, his entire body ached, no doubt from his fall in the Mountains but there was something about watching Fili and Kili tease Ori and listening to Oin mutter about stubborn dwarves that soothed the ache more than any of his teas back home.

Home, home was a funny word, one that had changed in definition during the course of this journey. His mother had always told tales about her adventures with Gandalf and Elves but as he grew older they had trailed off until they stopped all together, when his mother had been told that he would never have an adventure. Bilbo wondered what would have change if he had been able to have that Adventure that he and his Mother had planned for many of his childhood years, the plans that had been hidden in his pack.

Not that he had needed the list of things to do. As he had grown older it had become more than an Adventure list but a Must Do Before List. Item one had been meet Elves, Item two had been leave the Shire for longer than a day, Item three see the Mountains, the last Item had been one his mother had written, Fall in Love, Bilbo had crossed it out long before his mother had passed, because that wouldn't be fair.

"Mr. Boggins! Look at us!" Kili shouted as he and his brother did handstands.

Bilbo smiled indulgently at them, they really were just children he thought as he watched them fall over.

"Burglar." Thorin growled as he sat next to Bilbo.

"Yes, Dwarf?" Bilbo asked, not really in the mood to deal with the dwarven King's silliness.

The dwarf scowled, "Mr. Baggins, I am not a fool."

"You could have fooled me, Master Oakenshield." Bilbo snapped, turning to the shocked dwarven King. "Do you really think that Fili is ready to be a King? What were you even thinking running at the orcs? This quest is your doing; if you cannot see it through what reason do any of us have to do the same?" Bilbo asked honestly, "Are you so ready to die that you would fling yourself onto the sword of an enemy?"

Thorin opened and closed his mouth a few times before he scowled slightly. "What gives you the right to speak to me so? I am a King."

"Hobbits have no Kings, and I am a Hobbit, my company doesn't change that." Bilbo sighed, "Fili and Kili are not ready to lose their uncle either, and you did not see Dwalin's face as you raced to your doom."

"I see." Thorin muttered slowly.

Bilbo snorted, "Riight."

Thorin growled wordlessly and Bilbo giggled helplessly.

"Your face... haha, Green Lady, I can't breathe." Bilbo gasped wheezing as his body complained.

Bilbo held his side as his laughter trailed off, that was new, pain when he laughed.

"Halfling?"

"Elf." Bilbo snapped, tired of people using halfling as a way to gain his attention.

"Are you insulting me?" Thorin snarled.

"I am doing no more than you are doing, Halfling is rude and not a kind thing to call Hobbits." Bilbo sighed, "I'm tired, are we staying here for the night?"

"Yes." Thorin frowned as Bilbo stood and found a spot out of the way to settle.

The Hobbit walked slowly, as one would do when injured but Thorin frowned, he had done the same whenever they had made camp, many of them had put it off on him having lived a sheltered life and yet he should not have been moving so slowly after spending so much time with the company.

Thorin shook his head and pushed all thoughts of the Hal... Hobbit away.

Bilbo shivered as he waited to hear news of Thorin, Fili, and Kili, after all this was his fault, he just wanted to know that they would be okay, but he was freezing. Even he knew that that was never a good sign, it was the sign he had been waiting for long before the Dwarves had shown up on his door step, before Gandalf had dragged him onto this merry Adventure, the sign that his mother had been told would come to him eventually, the sign that his death was nearing.

Bilbo hummed when an Elf knelt next to him, fingers reaching.

"Don't," Bilbo whispered, looking into the Elf's blue eyes, "You can't help me."

The Elf frowned but left as Bilbo pushed to his feet, hissing as the world tilted and blurred a little.

"Bilbo." Bofur's grin was absent as he approached.

"Bofur, are the others okay?" Bilbo asked in a whisper.

"Thorin's asking for you." Was all he said.

"Oh." Bilbo exclaimed quietly.

The two walked to Thorin's tent, Bofur moving to steady Bilbo more than once as he swayed or stumbled.

"Have you seen one of the Healers?" Bofur asked.

"Don't need to." Bilbo muttered as they entered the tent.

"Bilbo." Thorin said as he pushed himself into a sitting position despite the Healer's protests.

"Hello." Bilbo whispered as he stumbled over to Thorin's side while the Healer and Bofur left them alone.

Thorin let out a laugh that cut off abruptly.

"You are well?" Thorin asked.

"As well as I was when I left my front door." Bilbo said truthfully.

Thorin frowned but continued. "I wish to ask your forgiveness."

Bilbo smiled, "You needn't ask, you have had it since the beginning, you were not yourself."

Thorin returned the smile and Bilbo sighed softly.

"What is it?" Thorin asked as Bilbo lay down on the cot next to Thorin, his legs no longer able to hold his weight.

"I am glad I lived long enough to see you smile." Bilbo murmured closing his eyes.

"What do you mean?!" Thorin shouted, "Halfling?!"

"Shh, Thorin, I'm sure others are in need of quiet." Bilbo whispered not opening his eyes. "I'm tired."

"What do you mean you have lived to see me smile?" Thorin whispered as he settled down next to the Hobbit, turning on his side to make more room and to face Bilbo.

Bilbo opened his eyes with great effort and looked into the King's blue eyes.

"You asked me once why I came back and I said something about Homes and how you all deserved to have yours back, that was all truth, but not the entire truth," Bilbo brushed hair out of Thorin's eyes, "I have been dying since I was little."

Thorin drew in a painfully sharp breath. "What?"

"None of the Shire Healers knew what it was, just that it was slowly killing me, slowly and painfully." Bilbo murmured, "I had given up on living, my mother and I had planned an Adventure, one we would take when I was old enough, we never went because I was sick. I had decided to live like a respectable Baggins of Bag-End until I just stopped breathing one day. Then..." Bilbo coughed harshly, covering his mouth with his hand and wiping the blood on the blanket.

Thorin twined his fingers with Bilbo's.

"Then Thirteen Dwarves invaded my kitchen and I... took the chance for an adventure." Bilbo smiled slightly at Thorin closing his eyes as he moved closer to Thorin's body heat, he was so very cold, "You know... I crossed out all the things on the list mother and I made for our Adventure."

Thorin brushed his free hand's thumb over Bilbo's eyebrow, the other hand still entwined with Bilbo's. "What was on it?"

"The first thing was meet Elves, which we did, Item two had been leave the Shire for longer than a day which we did, a year is longer than a day, Item three see the Mountains which we did, but I had to admit that your mountain is my favorite, despite the Dragon, the last Item my mother wrote." Bilbo murmured sleepily.

"What was it?" Thorin asked.

"It was Fall In Love." Bilbo whispered opening his eyes to look at Thorin, "Which I did."

Thorin pulled Bilbo close and held him tightly as he closed his eyes.

"Thorin..."

"What?"

"I'm cold."

"I know."

"I'm tired."

"I know, sleep, I'll keep watch."

"Thorin?"

"Yes, Bilbo?"

"I love you."

"I know, I love you too, Ghivashel."

"What's that mean?"

"Treasure of all Treasures..."

So...Um...I watched A Little Bit of Heaven today and this Idea just wouldn't leave me alone.

This is just what I got out, since I haven't read the book I left it a little vague, If anyone wants to flesh this out into a longer fic feel free, I may revisit it later, I'm not sure, just trying to get back into the swing of writing.

Soo the thoughts I had were that the reason Bilbo rushes after the Dwarves is because he doesn't want to die in the Shire, and I left it open ended so you can have a Miracle cure or something if you want, and I implied a little Thorin/Bilbo, whether they were together before the Arkenstone thing is up to you. As well as if any of the company finds out, obviously not Thorin. Gandalf doesn't know, neither do the Elves, Beorn might, 'cause animals can sometimes smell sickness. The Sickness is open to interpretation, It could be some form of Cancer or just something that kills it's victim slowly and painfully and if it affected others in the Shire or just Bilbo, I didn't even think about what would happen with the Ring, buried with Bilbo or not? 


End file.
